You Smell Like Home
by Amaggiepie
Summary: Jacob/Bella. Mostly canon rewrite beginning at the end of Eclipse. Bella goes to visit Jacob after he is injured and realizes that her future isn't something to be given away so carelessly.
1. Chapter 1:  Dream

I am not Stephenie Meyer. And I thank God every day. Consider yourself disclaimed.

A shaggy russet wolf springs into view, shouldering the grey one out of harm's way. There is no time to react —the vampire's marble arms open and lock around his middle before he even lands. Smiling darkly, the pale boy squeezes. The sick crunch of bone is drowned out by a high pitched whimper.

_In an instant, two others are at his side, slightly smaller in stature but just as fierce. The blond vampire's eyes widen as the wolves approach him from both sides, his head swinging from side to side so quickly it blurs. He drops his captive and lunges for the wolf with mottled fur, the smaller of the two. Before he can reach him, his left leg is swiftly ripped from his body by the larger beast. He falls; they are right on top of him, snarling and gnashing their teeth. Snowy appendages litter the ground, too-heavy cinderblocks falling onto the wet grass. _

_The russet wolf lies eerily still. Before my eyes, his shape begins to blur, shift, until it is no longer a horse-sized beast who lay prone in the damp grass, but a human, a man. _

_Jacob._

_Oh no. No! No, no, no; not him! Not Jake. Not my Jacob._

"Jacob!"

"Bella! Bella, darling. Wake up!" Someone was shaking me. A frigid hand caressed my check. I clutched my fists against my chest and took a few deep, gasping breaths in an attempt to slow my racing heart.

"It was just a dream, Bella. I'm here. Jacob is going to make a full recovery. Remember?" Edward whispered.

"I know," I sighed, opening my eyes. I remembered now. We were in the backseat of Edward's Volvo, and Alice was driving me home.

I looked out the tinted window, hoping for a glimpse of anything familiar, anything to indicate we were almost there. It was useless, of course. The depth of the Forks night, coupled with Alice's lead foot, revealed nothing more than a blur of muted color in the darkness.

I sighed again and snuggled into Edward's chest, crossing my arms and shivering. Instead of being comforted by his familiar cool stillness, it made me uneasy. Vampires really didn't make very comfortable pillows.

My mind drifted to last night in the tent, my body pressed into Jake's when he somehow squeezed into the impossibly small space beside me in my sleeping bag. He was so soft, so warm… and I swear I felt something hot and hard pressing into the small of my back when we woke. I shook my head, thankful for the darkness which hid the blush rising onto my cheeks, and the nameless anomaly that had somehow rendered me immune to Edward's power to read minds. What kind of horrible person was I, thinking about Jacob like that when my fiancé was sitting right next to me? Still, as much as I told myself it was wrong, I couldn't help but remember the electricity that crackled between us, so dense it was almost tangible_—_his breath, hot and moist against my neck, tickling my ear. The feel of his lips on mine lit a fire that started in my mouth and raged south, blazing all the way to my core. He needed me. He wanted me. The kiss we shared was unlike anything I had ever experienced with Edward. Edward was always so careful, but Jacob didn't have to be. He was giving me all of himself, everything he had. Fighting for me, even now. _Until your heart stops beating._

I chewed on my lip and looked down at my fisted hands. I wrinkled my nose at the sight of my fingernails, which Alice had painted a sickening shade of hot pink. Of course, we had to keep up the charade of our "sleepover" for Charlie. To her delight, I was obliged to let Alice play dress up with me before declaring it was time to head home. _The things I do for Charlie. _But I didn't have to like it.

_Part of being a Cullen is being meticulously responsible, _she said. Of course I already had my story memorized. But all I wanted from the moment I had heard Jacob was hurt was to be by his side. There was a huge knot in my stomach, and I was freezing. I _ached_ for him. And I was tired of playing along in the name of responsibility.

"Alice, are we there yet?" I whined, looking wistfully out the window.

"We'll be there in two minutes," she said, looking over her shoulder and flashing me an impish grin. "Now remember, Bella, you need to make sure Charlie believes you. Do you want to go over it one more time?"

"Ugh. No way," I huffed. "We've been over it a thousand times already. It's not rocket science, Alice."

If my remark bothered her, she didn't show it. I felt guilty for a moment, but I was already starting to feel claustrophobic pressed between the car door and Edward's chest. I sat up straight and pulled away from him, and he adjusted his arm so it circled loosely around my shoulders. I didn't understand why, but his constant touch grated on my already frayed nerves. He seemed to fear I might fall apart any second.

"Really Alice, it'll be fine. Charlie loves you and I'm pretty sure he thinks you're incapable of lying."

"Me? Tell a lie?" she mocked offense. "Never."

I couldn't help but crack a smile. Edward rolled his eyes.

Alice brought the Volvo to a smooth stop in from of my house. The flowery scent of the two of them hung heavy in the stale air like too much perfume. It was smothering me. _Odd_, I thought to myself as I wrinkled my nose. The vampire smell had never been offensive to me before, just a hint of sweet honeysuckle. Edward leaned in for a kiss goodbye. I turned my head suddenly so his lips ended up closer to my ear than my mouth, then opened the door abruptly and took a deep breath of fresh, cool air. Throwing my overstuffed backpack over my shoulder (it was stuffed with "evidence") I muttered goodbye and started up the walk without a backward glance. Charlie's cruiser was parked beside my truck in the driveway–he was waiting for me as Alice had predicted.

After grilling me for a few minutes on my weekend with Alice and making me swear, repeatedly, on pain of permanent grounding, never to ride a motorcycle again, Charlie's face softened.

"You okay, kiddo?" he asked, stuffing his hands into his pockets. He was looking at me hard, the way he used to when Edward's absence rendered me a zombie of my former self, searching for a sign that I was coming undone.

"Just worried about Jake, really," I said with forced lightness. "I'm going down to La Push as soon as I make dinner." I hadn't been home all weekend, and I was certain that Charlie had been living off of pizza and other junk. I hoped he had the decency to at least hide the evidence. Last time I was away, I came home to a stack of pizza boxes and Styrofoam containers piled next to the back door. Charlie definitely deserved a good home-cooked meal. I started toward the kitchen.

"Don't worry about me," Charlie said. "Sue fed me while I was down there. Just got back a few minutes before you did." He patted his stomach for emphasis. "Go ahead now; I'm sure Jake'd love some company."

"He's awake?" I was already shoving my feet back into my sneakers.

"Well, he was when I saw him. Cussing up a storm too. I hope you don't pick up that kinda vocabulary, Bells."

"I'm going now then." I pulled on my coat and grabbed my keys off the table. "Thanks, Dad." I touched his shoulder, and then ran out the door.

I made it to La Push in record time, for me anyway. My truck groaned and shook as the speedometer rose to just over 60 miles per hour.

I pulled up to the little red house and tripped up the stairs. Billy opened the door as I raised my hand to knock. I was sure all of La Push must've heard me pull up from the way my truck was roaring after its sprint. Billy looked older than he had the last time I has seen him. There were dark circles under his eyes, which has lost their usual shine. I could swear his weathered face had acquired a few new lines. He gave me a weak smile and rolled back into the hallway so I could come in. The little house was oddly quiet, and seemed bigger without Jacob there to fill the space with his six-foot-five frame and infectious smile.

"Jake?"

"In his room." Billy motioned to the closed door down the hall as if I had forgotten which one it was. "I think he's been waiting for you," he added with a wink.

"Thanks."

I moved to open the door but stopped short, resting my hand on the knob instead and taking a few deep breaths in a futile attempt to calm the fish flopping around in my stomach.

What I was going to say? Since I had heard he was hurt, my only thoughts were that I had to see him, to see for myself that he was okay. I never got any farther than that. I closed my eyes and swallowed hard before easing the door open.

Jake was asleep and snoring softly with his mouth slightly open, his giant frame dwarfing the twin bed. Although he was propped up with at least half a dozen pillows, his feet hung awkwardly off the end. The entire right side of his body was covered in bandages. Guilt stung my eyes and burned the back of my throat. If it hadn't been for me, this would never have happened. I stepped into the room, closing the door behind me as quietly as I could, and knelt on the floor by his side. His right arm was bound to his chest with a sling. Beads of sweat lingered on his brow. I placed my hand on his forehead and pulled away suddenly—he was on fire! He had to be running a fever, he felt too hot even by werewolf standards.

"Oh Jake!" I whispered and buried my face in the pillows next to his. Tears were falling in earnest now and I made no attempt to hold them back. There was no need to feign strength when it was just the two of us. "This is all my fault! I should never have—"

"Bells?" he croaked. He opened his eyes, and pulled me into a hug with his good arm. He inhaled sharply as I bumped against the other.

I jumped up as if scalded. "Oh! I'm so sorry, Jake! Did I hurt you? Can I get you anything?" My hands fluttered in the air uselessly. I wanted him to tell me where the pieces were so I could put him back together. So I could put us back together. Anything to make it right.

"It's fine," he winced. "Really, Bells. I'm okay. I guess I forgot about it for a second." He motioned to his bad arm and shot me a smile that brightened the room. "When did you get here? I didn't even hear you come in."

I wrung my hands, not knowing what to do with them. "Not too long ago. I came as soon as I heard you were up." I decided on shoving them into my pockets and studied the floor.

"Bella. Come back. I'm fine, really."

I obliged, sinking down to the floor at the head of the bed. There was a hole in the threadbare comforter and some stuffing was hanging out of it.

"Bells, honey. Look at me," he pleaded. He lifted my chin so that I was staring directly into his eyes. The fire I saw there startled me.

"Jake, I—"

"Shhhhhh." He brought his finger to my lips, let it linger there for a beat, then traced a line of fire from my mouth back to my earlobe and down to the nape of my neck. My body quivered under his touch. I ached for more. And this time, I leaned in to kiss him.

It was nothing like the other kisses we shared—the rough, desperate, pleading kisses; kisses full of fear and doubt, pressed for time. No, this was sensual and natural and right. His lips moved against mine slowly and softly, taking their time as they learned the curves of my mouth. His tongue darted out tentatively, tasting. I inhaled sharply through my nose and parted my lips for him. He tasted like sweat and Cool Ranch Doritos. My mouth was on fire.

When I finally pulled away we were both gasping for breath, faces flushed.

"Wow, Bells. Uh…"

"Jake, we really need to talk." Suddenly it was all coming together. I knew what I was supposed to say.

"I love you more." It was the truth. I took his huge, hot hand between my own.

He smirked. "It's about goddamn time. Well, now that both of us know that—"

"Wait! Let me finish. I'm so sorry for everything Jake. I mean _everything_. I've been so horrible and selfish—"

"No you haven't—"

"I have," I said decidedly. "I thought I knew what I wanted. I thought that Edward was everything I _should_ want." His eyes narrowed at the name. "I thought I couldn't live without him Jake. But, I _already did_. It's you...I just, I can't even—" I shook my head, trying to organize my thoughts. "When you kissed me, something happened. I felt so alive. And I saw…" Heat rose to my cheeks, and I picked at the hole in the comforter. Alice's pink nail polish had already begun to chip.

"What did you see?" He wriggled his way into a more upright position, grabbed a bottle of water off the nightstand and chugged it. "You know you can tell me anything, right? We're still best friends." He crumpled the bottle and tossed it toward the door.

"Are we Jake?" I stood up and turned to face him. "Can you honestly say that? You have to know we're way more than best friends!"

He was looking at me with that silly half smile on his face, the smug one. Half of me wanted to slap him for his mental I told you so's, and the other half wanted to kiss him again. But seeing him all busted up like this, I couldn't even feign anger. He had been right the whole time, after all. I sat down on the edge of the bed.

"When you kissed me, I saw us, our future together." I was talking fast now, praying to get through this before my newfound courage failed me. "There was a wedding, and a little red house down on the corner, and… kids. Two of 'em." I blushed. "I never really thought much about having kids. I mean, they're cute and all, and I figured it would happen eventually, but," I lowered my voice to a whisper, "it didn't seem like such a big deal to give that up."

Jake's expression turned serious. "You shouldn't have to give anything up," he growled. "It's just wrong of him to expect that from you. This is your _life_, Bella. You only get one." He took my hand again. "You know we barely get by around here, but we make it. I can't buy you mansions or fancy cars, but I can give you so much more. Things money can't buy. And those are the things he's taking away." He sighed. "Bells, all I want is for you to be happy. Happy, and alive." He kissed my hand, then frowned at it. "Nail polish?"

I shrugged. "Alice."

We rolled our eyes in unison.

"Jake, what I'm trying to say is I don't think I'm ready to give that future up."

Then the bedroom door burst open unceremoniously. I felt like someone had thrown a bucket of ice water over me.

"You have some more company." Billy wheeled through the doorway. "Everything okay in here?" he asked, raising an eyebrow.

I suppose it must've looked like we were having a staring contest. I went to pull my hand away, but Jake held it firm.

"Yep, all good, Dad. Who's here?"

As if on cue, Seth bounded into the room.

"Hey, Jake! Hey, Bella!" he barked. He had to have grown 8 inches since the last time I saw him, and had filled out a little, though he was still mostly arms and legs.

"Hey, Seth" Jake answered. "How're the guys holding up?"

"Eh— alright I guess. Just worried about you. They'll be okay." He shook his head and flopped down at the end of the bed, leaning over to rest his elbows on his knees. "You had us really worried for a while there, you know. Leah wanted to come down too, but Sam's pretty pissed about what happened. So he gave an order and put her on patrol. With Paul. "

Jake snorted. "Oh, I bet they're having loads of fun."

"Yea, right. _Fun_." An awkward silence fell over the room. Seth shuffled his feet, then straightened up, scratching the back of his head. "So…you guys 'together' now, or what?"

I looked down at our clasped hands and smiled.

"Well, I mean— " Jake started, blushing hard.

"Yeah," I cut him off. I had to show him I was serious, that I was sure this time. "We are. Me and Edward…I'm breaking off the engagement, Seth."

I looked over at Jake, who was blinking profusely and seemed a bit dazed by the whole turn of events, then up at Seth, smiling from ear to ear and all but bouncing with excitement. I couldn't believe I had been so ready to give them up not too long ago.

"This is where I belong." Jake finally broke out into a grin, and placed a fiery kiss on the back on my hand, sending a chill up my arm.

"Bella, that's _great_!" Unable to contain himself any longer, Seth sprung from the bed. "The Pack is going to be so happy!" Seth already had his hand on the doorknob.

"Seth. Wait, don't—"

"See ya!" That fast, he was gone.

Jacob raked his left hand through his hair, then pinched the bridge of his nose. "Shit. Shit shit shit!" he whispered under this breath.

"Well, you knew they'd find out eventually, Jake," I said, raising an eyebrow. I knew he was more than happy to have me here, now. Maybe a bit nervous that I might change my mind again, but he was happy and he believed me. But the Pack probably wouldn't be as welcoming after everything that had happened.

As the weight and implications of my decision set in, I realized that I still had to tell Charlie—and _Edward_, about my drastic change heart, which would alter the course of the rest of my life. Edward's ring suddenly felt very heavy on my hand. Silently, I slipped it off my finger and into my pocket.

**A/N: Thus, I begin my journey into multichapterhood. I was trying to wait until I had a few chapters to post this, but I need cheerleaders as an inspiration to keep writing. This has been sitting on my flash chip for a few months. **

**No set update schedule as of yet, since I'm also working on some other one-shots and recording a podfic. Life is crazy. So please, review! If I know people are reading I'll feel accountable and all that good stuff, so updates will come quicker. Promise ;)**


	2. Sneak Peek and Author's Note

**AUTHOR'S NOTE**

**I know it's been FOREVER since I posted the first chapter of this story. I'm SO SORRY! Real life has been happening and it's been crazy. I am working on this story again, and I should have another chapter up sometime next week (Jake POV!). For now, I don't have a set update schedule but I'm going to try my best to make them weekly. Thanks for sticking with this story if you're still reading!**

**In the future, I'm going to shoot for 8-10K words per chapter. So here is a little snippet that will be moved to the end of chapter one at the next update.**

**Please review if you like! **

* * *

><p>Edward came through my window just as I was drifting off to sleep.<p>

The night's events flashed through my mind—_the shocking heat of Jacob's slick tongue in my mouth—"I love you more," —"This is your _life_, Bella. You only get one," —"I'm breaking off the engagement." _A sick feeling settled in the pit of my stomach, and I closed my eyes tightly, like I could wish him away if I tried hard enough. I really, _really_did not want to deal with this right now. I considered feigning sleep, but I was sure my racing heart had already betrayed me.

"Bella?" he whispered. His cool breath tickled the shell of my ear and I gave an involuntary shudder. He was sitting on the corner of the bed right next to my pillow, but I hadn't realized he was so close. I hadn't felt him sit down. "Are you okay, love? Your heartbeat…"

With I sigh, I opened my eyes. "I'm fine. It was just a bad dream."

The sick feeling was still there, and I felt a familiar panic rising in my throat at the thought of telling him it was over. _Get it together, Bella_. I had made my choice. Alice had probably already seen it. Maybe Edward already knew, and was here to say goodbye.

_Yeah, keep deluding yourself. He wouldn't be acting so normal if he knew._

_Well, you never know._

_Uh-huh. Keep telling yourself that, B._

_You know, talking to yourself is bad enough, but these internal debates are just one step away from clinical insanity. _I wiped my sweaty palms on the blanket and sat up, faking a smile in a sad attempt at composure.

Edward reached out and tucked a strand of hair behind my ear. "I'm sorry to disturb you so late, dear. But Alice had a vision—"

The rest of his words were drowned out by the frantic beating of my heart. _Oh my God. She knows. Does he know? Did she tell him?_I could feel the blood rush out of my face as I blanched.

"— and so Tanya invited all of us; it means a lot to all of them that we be there. Do you think Charlie would permit you to accompany us?"

I blinked a few times and looked up at him, confused. "W-wait a minute. What?"

The corner of his mouth turned up in a smirk, and he all but rolled his eyes at me. "Were you even listening to me, darling? I said Tanya is getting married, and she invited us to the wedding. It would be disrespectful not to attend. Do you think Charlie will allow you to go?"

"To…Alaska?"

"Well yes. That _is_ where the Denali clan is located, after all." He ran a hand through his perfect bronze locks and smiled down at me with his eyes. "It would mean a lot to me if you could come. After all, our own wedding is only a few weeks away. You're already part of the family." His eyes were _so pretty_, a rich honey-brown which, was oddly brilliant despite the dimly lit room. I took a deep breath and felt the tension drain out of me. I felt warm, there was a pleasant dull hum in my ears. _It _would_ be nice to get away from here for a while. Maybe I could think of something to tell Charlie_—

_No! What's wrong with you? Wake up, he's doing that 'dazzling' thing again. _

Suddenly, I could see Jacob in my mind's eye, as clearly as if he were right in front of me.

_We're standing in his garage, and the tinny pitter-patter of rain on the roof is broken by a crack of thunder. Jacob leans back against his workbench, tucking a greasy rag into the front pocket of his cutoffs. Both of his arms are streaked with oil. His mouth is set in a frown, and he runs a dirty hand through his cropped hair, leaving a black smudge on his left cheekbone. Suddenly, he closes the space between us, grabbing my hand._

_"__He's like a drug for you, Bella. I see that you can't live without him now. It's too late." Pain is written in the set of his eyes, the lines of his face. "But I would have been healthier for you. Not a drug; I would have been the air, the sun."_

The humming stopped as abruptly as it started. I shook my head to clear the strange foggy feeling and jerked away from him, clutching my cold hand to my chest. "What was that?" I demanded.

His brow furrowed for a split-second before he remembered himself and smoothed his features. "Whatever do you mean dear? I was just asking a question." He spoke softly, like I was some scared animal he wanted to coax back to hand.

"That. That _thing_you did with your eyes, your voice. That hypno-thing." I scooted to the far side of the bed and kicked at the mess of covers. "Ugh!" I tossed the tangle of blankets to the floor in frustration and got to my feet, backing further away from him and bumping into the rocking chair.

"Come now, Bella. You _do _hear yourself, don't you? You realize how ridiculous—"

"Me?" Now _I _was ridiculous? I could tell I was being handled. "No, Edward. It's you." My eyes widened as the words came back to me: _I'm the world's most dangerous predator. Everything about me invites you in. My voice, my face, even my smell. As if I wouldn't need any of that. As if you could out-run me. As if you could fight me off._It seemed like those warnings were from a lifetime ago. At the time, I hadn't thought much of it.

"You're trying to _manipulate _me! Like some kind of vampire mind control _shit_!" My hand flew to my mouth, I was shaking all over.

Edward rose slowly, taking small steps around the bed with a quizzical look on his face. "I'm not sure what you mean, love," he said in a low voice. "I wasn't doing anything."

I crossed my arms tightly against my chest and pointedly refused to look him in the eyes. "I really think you should go now, Edward," I said slowly through clenched teeth. "I-I need to be alone. Please don't come in through the window anymore."

I couldn't see his expression, but his voice grew soft and sad. "Alright. Whatever you want." A pang of guilt washed over me as I imagined those perfect features crumpled into disappointment. He ran his fingers down the side of my arm in a fleeting caress, then vaulted silently out the open window and into the dark, starless night.


End file.
